The police: How do you want your call directed?
Aphra: I’d like to speak to someone about road traffic, please
The police: How can I help you?
Aphra: I’d like to report a goose in the road – it’s a live goose, just wandering around
The police: Thank you very much. It has already been reported. Is it on Long Hill?
Aphra: That’s the one. It’s fine. Admiring itself in a car. But it might be a danger to traffic.
The police: It’s all right. We are sending our finest goose-catchers to catch it.
I wouldn’t have been so amused, but it was an urban street.