Once again, Charlotte comes to my rescue: Saved by a meme indeed:
1. Explain what ended your last relationship
Ah. One of the unsolved mysteries of the universe that one. Wish I knew. In the words of Peter Green, “I could tell you about my life. It’d keep you amused, I’m sure”.
2. When was the last time you shaved?
Years ago. I wax, or I get other people to wax me.
3. What were you doing at 8am today?
Swimming. Length 28 or thereabouts.
4. What were you doing 15 minutes ago?
Cooking. Reading my emails. Looking at my blog stats. Making a cup of tea.
5. Are you any good at maths?
I also have an unfortunate penchent for creating mathmaticky jokes. Is it because i is imaginary?
6. Your prom night?
British. We don’t have prom nights.
7. Do you have any famous ancestors?
Not that I can think of. I do have one who was hanged in Edinburgh for stealing a sheep on a Sunday. Any other day of the week and we’d have all been Australians.
8. Did you have to take out a loan for university?
We had grants when I did my first degree. I have a loan for my Masters, which is oddly related to #1. But we don’t go there.
9. Do you know the words to the song on your Myspace profile?
I doubt it.
10. Last thing received in the mail?
National Trust Membership card.
11. What beverages have you had today?
Tea. Tea. Red Bull. Spiced Chai. Spiced Chai.
12. Do you leave messages on people’s answering machines.
Most of the time.
13. Whom did you lose your CONCERT virginity to?
The Eagles. Though I find that hard to believe.
It was Cliff Richard.
At the Albert Hall.
14. Do you draw your name in the sand when you go to the beach?
No. I photograph other peoples’ valentines.
15. What is the most painful dental procedure you have ever had?
None. I tend to pass time at the dentist in sexual fantasy. Not about the dentist, you understand. I discovered this when I had a dental appointment after an unexpected trotting-out the night before. In the words of Dr Hook: “The best ones are re-runs if you know what I mean”. Since then I associate dentistry with sexual reminiscences and huge bills.
16. What is out your back door?
I don’t actually have a back door.
17. Any plans for Friday night?
Seeing “Thatcher the Musical” with the one I see musicals with and with a long-term internet wierdo friend of mine.
18. Do you like what the ocean does to your hair?
Actually no. I have a sense of humour failure about things which put my hair out of condition.
19. Have you ever received one of those big tins with three different kinds of popcorn?
No. But my life has been rich and full in many ways, and I don’t feel deprived. Also, I know how to make popcorn.
20. Have you ever been to a planetarium?
21. Do you re-use towels after you shower?
22. Some things you are excited about
Ah well. Snowdrops. I get excited about snowdrops. And full moons. Particularly ones where I can drive on back roads without my lights on. And Waitrose’s lemon cheesecake. And unexpected cheques in the post. And pantomimes. I like pantomimes.
23. Your favourite Jello flavour
24. Describe your key chain
A 3″ Virgin branded biro, my house keys, my car keys, the keys to the house of the one I visit some weekends, the keys of my friend’s house “just in case”, a “Sentinel” numbered key fob, and a trolley-coin the size of a £1 bit for using in lockers and super-market troleys.
25. Where do you keep your change?
In my purse.
26. What winter coat do you own?
How long have you got?
A dark red velvet trench coat made in Nepal which I love but don’t wear very much
A dark blue wool trench coat I bought as an Investment Purchase 20 years ago, and a good investment it proved to be
A green wax jacket I bought over 20 years ago when I was temping at a clothing wholesaler
A black mid-thigh length dannimac jacket with a black furry collar
A black fleece marked “Outback Eclipse December 2002” from the Eclipse in Ceduna
A red mid-thigh length padded dannimac style jacket which needs dry cleaning
A blue suede jacket I bought in a farmers’ warehouse in Sweden
A – ahem – er – fur coat my ex husband bought for me, which has proven useful in sexual encounters and midnight trips to church
I can’t think of any others right now. When I buy coats, I tend to keep them.
27. What was the weather like on your graduation day?
Ah. Embarrassing this. I didn’t actually graduate. Good job it was before Student Loans, eh?
28. Do you sleep with your bedroom door open or closed?
Open. I have cats.